CHESTERFIELD, DERBYSHIRE 1992
THE WELCOME INVITE SENT TO EACH PIKE
From the Pikehand Archive
Your organisers welcome you to the 1992 event and hope that you all participate in the spirit that has become renowned throughout the country. Not to differ from previous years this year sees another round of desperate endeavour to inspire abstinence. You really MUST try this time. Drying out an addiction is a time consuming process. Your organisers recognise this and compensate by allowing beverages of the malt and yeast type under strict supervision for several days.
Enough of the stern stuff. An exhaustive programme of excess has been arranged. Each Pike will need to prepare himself in body and mind to meet the challenge ahead. Start training straight away. Read the course study guide carefully. You must bring the essential items with you. Complete the pre-study exercises before your journey as they will be used early. Within the assignments you must be fully aware who your team members are. Other items listed are not essential but may be called upon at any time so like a "Brownie!" "Be prepared for all eventualities."
We have set assignments, projects, research, duties and schedules that have to be achieved on time if all activities are to be completed and assessed by depareture time. With such a full calendar we start the the course on Thursday afternoon/evening, as last year. There will be relaxation periods at pre-defined stages as shown in the "Programme Schedule." So, although it may seem daunting at this point in time, we are sure that your selection to attend such a prestigious annual event will be the envy of all your contemporaries and a memory to savour. WELCOME to, "Brown Close House," your conference centre.
Bob and Paul were organisers. Also attending were Alan, Bryan, Gra, Jeff, Neil, Nick Pete and Ray. Once again four days and a large house in a small village with a pub within a few metres of our door. Each Pike had been tasked with bringing with him something that could be used to engage and entertain all the Pikes and to be revealed at kit inspection. The immediate urgency was beer and food. So to the pub. Unknown to us was that it was under new management. It was a bit before opening time so we waited impatiently. Once open the beer was good and food menu looked OK. Whilst deciding what to eat we had a pint or two. Then we had our meals. Meanwhile locals had made the place even more hospitable. Following the meal and a little more imbibing the landlord called for teams in a pub quiz. A cask of beer was the prize. One thing about Pikes is they never duck a challenge and this looked rather promising. Came marking and at the end Pikes were awarded one point less than one of the local teams. In truth they had the answer to a VAT question wrong and we had it right because Bryan's job was a tax inpector. However the quiz master was the landlord and like organisers is always right! So after a few more pints we left empty handed.
Mutiny! To a man the Pikes refused to indulge in kit inspection so we never found out if Gra had forgotton his tea towel. We were sure though that Bryan would not have a tankard. We have not had a kit inspection since apart from a partial one in the future. In the interest of points scoring we had to reveal if each Pike had brought something to entertain other Pikes. All confirmed they had something with them but what it was could not be openly revealed and their honesty was not questioned. what did you actually bring Pikes? It so happened that none of their objects were used at all during the weekend. Pikes were aquainted with a theme for the weekend. They were each to steal from the others but only if need arose. The organisers were involved as well with extra points if a Pike stole from them. The currency was coloured plastic counters with holes drilled in them to avoid dishonesty. Well, a cheating Pike could have bought more counters when he was in town. Pikes were set into two teams. Throughout the weekend there would be several events where pre-defined points could be won. To enhance team chances they could declare and present a JOKER that they had to secretly make from what ever they found. This would double their team points score if they were the winner. The JOKER could only be used once in the weekend. First event was a yes/no activity there and then. Armed with their respective supply of counters we all began talking in random pairs. If either Pike used yes or no he had to give his opponent one of his counters. Obviously they each wanted to engage either Bob or Paul. Surprisingly unexpected Pikes fared better than others. After about half an hour, organisers minus a few counters, Ray Talking to Alan was drawn into a dissagreeing exclamation of no no no no no! It left him bereft of counters. The weekend theme was abandoned from then on. But, it was now bed time! Ray, sharing with Neil was tempted to steal some of his counters during the night. Conscience or alcohol won.
There were twenty one assignments this year. Only a few were undertaken from which arose an individual and team winner. After breakfast Pikes were issued with written instructions, advising among other things, of white water rafting. Quickly they all re-packed their haversacks with towels and spare clothing and the like and off we set. After quite a walk over meadows and fields they were stopped and an area of grass was laid out in a rectangular pitch. This task was to guide a blinfolded Pike over the pitch (minefield) avoiding mines that had been placed by the opposing team once the victim was blinfolded. He was then spun around by the opposing team then guidance began. Teams lined up along the length either side of the minfield and yelled instructions. Obviously the wrong ones from opponents. If a team member, in his enthusiasm, stepped inside the minefield he lost points for his team whether or not he was an opponent. All Pikes were victims in turn with the mines relayed for each run. The noise was deafening so just as well we were miles from anywhere. No JOKER was declared by either team for this event. With mines and minefield stowed away we proceeded to our next event the white water rafting.
At the top of a rise in woodland a beautiful lake was revealed. There was a bridge over the overflow down a small cascade to the stream below. Teams were tasked with creating a small craft from whatever they could find in the pristine woodland.
It is remarkable what they found to construct their rafts. Teams could criticise their opponent's raft and opponents could repond. Points were awarded according to the design of each raft and the originality of critique or reply. Then to the event. Crafts were set adrift on the lake side of the bridge in a race to get freely to the stream below first and intact. Still no JOKER. Then off to a pub at the top of the estate for liquid and solid lunch.
Paul was good with the beer guide so in Chesterfield we spent the evening, until closing, at a pub having about twenty hand pulls. It was heaving and obviously popular. Pikes enjoyed it so much, The following day, they rejected the planned Pike dinner in favour dinner at this pub. name of pub anyone
Next morning we took the bus into town. It was market day. Teams task was to find the Stone connection. As expected the local twisted spire church became the center of team attention until lunch time. At lunch no team had found a Stone which was very surprising because there was one over each grave and plenty more lined up around the churchyard walls and the building itself was built of the things even if none of them were engrave with the name Stone. Incidentally it is difficult to emphasise upper or lower case in verbal instructions. After lunch their task was to buy the cheapest item they could and get a receipt to verify before meeting at the bus terminal for the return to our digs. We travelled on the upper deck. One team had bought a pack of Tampax and displayed them as ear rings, broaches, nose blockers, spectacle enhancers, etc. After eating and clearing up both teams decided they would present their JOKER. The first was shown amid lots of shouting and laughter. However the second was a master piece. It resembled Irish Orange Marching banners. How Pikes managed to get the thing together in secrecy is worth a chapter or two. Needless to say it won the points.
The following day we took the bus to a renown pub! "Sarah Hughes" Some time after this weekend Alan told Bob that he had brought, as his object to entertain Pikes, a unicycle. Now see what you missed due to mutiny!!